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Church Pranks

1. Replace baby Jesus with a piece of ham in a manger scene. Or you could use a black cabbage patch kid.
2. Before heading back overseas to Iraq or Afghanistan, see if the local priest will bless your weapon. Try it while there are still people sitting in service.
3. Confess about your obsessive compulsvie disorder, and how you cannot stop the urges to kill. You can laugh all maniaclly and say the urge is coming on, then all of us sudden bang around inside the confessional, slam open the door and run out of church immediatley
4. Use water, corn starch, and red food coloring to make fake blood. Then take a small cup of it with you to church. Pour a couple drops into the holy water and spill a little on the floor
5. If you can get access to the sound control box that sends the sound throughout the church during service then try playing Public Service Announcement 2000 by Eminem near the beginning of service. Or Intermission by The Offspring in the middle of service.
6. The night before sunday service, replace the holy bibles with satanic bibles.
7. During a wedding, burst in during the middle of it, run to the bride, give a long speech about how sorry you are and how much you love her, then run out.
8. Go to communion and drink the entire goblet of wine.
9. When everyone stands to sing a song, dash into the aisle and break-dance.
10. Use cinnamon oil to write satanic messages on your face before being baptised. When the priest dunks your head in holy water, it will show up as burned marks and be very clear what you wrote. You will also scream in pain. Because it will hurt, so be careful
11. Take some hand tools with you to service. Just keep them in your pocket. Then during service when you have to use the restroom, use the tools to dissemble the toilet, stall, sink, etc and just walkout. You will get some interesting reactions when service ends and people have to use the restroom.
12. Zip tie shoe laces! The people sitting in front of you won't suspect you going underneath them and tying their shoes together. Zip ties make it easier and quicker.
13. While the bride is away on her honeymoon, go into her closet and tie all of her shoe laces together. It is frustrating and takes a long time to undo all of them.
14. During the wedding, have the ushers black out one of their front teeth and smile every chance they get at the groom. Watch as your buddy (the groom) tries his hardest not to laugh.
15. During the wedding ceremony, wrap a chain around the groom's neck with a cow bell on it. Lock it with a combination lock. Then tell him he has to call you on his honeymoon to get the combination to unlock it.
16. Arrive at church before everyone else and pour a lilttle flour on all the prayer benches. Most people won't notice til they leave the building. Everyone walking out will have white powdered knees.
17. While in service at church, release three mice while nobody is looking. Write the numbers 1, 2, and 4 on the backs of these mice. Church officials will be scrambling all day to find that number 3 mouse that doesn't exist.
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